Thursday, May 11, 2006

Blogging, writing, reading....

Have you ever wondered why people blog? Do they blog for the fun of it, for the chance to put their thoughts down in writing, for the audience...or for other reasons? When I first started blogging, I did it for my own benefit. For the chance to put some of my thoughts down in writing, and after awhile, I started doing it as much for myself as I was perhaps doing it with the realization that others might be reading it. Do the comments of others really matter? I used to think no, but there are times I looked to see if there were any comments and found myself a little disappointed. I'm not really sure why either, because as I say, my original plan when I started this was for my own benefit.

Blogging is a way of making contact with others...that is if they happen to read your blog. It is a way of keeping in touch with friends, and family to let them know what's happening in your life. It is a way to write down your feelings and express your self. It is a way to find release in writing down your innermost feelings. I wonder how many strangers and people read the blogs who don't know us; who don't know anything about our lives until they read the things we write.

It's been awhile since I checked my blog, or wrote anything here. I'm not really sure why. I haven't particularly felt up to blogging recently, nor have I felt up to doing a whole lot of things as my pain as increased, and my allergies and sinus have acted up. I've also been feeling really stressed out financially, physically, emotionally, spiritually..... I'm not really sure why. It seems to often happen at this time of year. For many it's the winter months that bring on the emotional stress; the darkness, and short days of sun, not getting out amongst people in the same way, and often a difficult time financially after the crunch of Christmas.
I used to enjoy mother's day, but since my mother is no longer alive, and I have no mother in law, or grandmothers, and I've allowed myself to grow apart from soem certain people, there is no one for me to really concern myself about. It was also on mother's day last year when we lost our precious Sheltie of 10 years. I still miss him, although we now have another Sheltie to take his place.

Finances are really tight...and that's a big issue and problem around here. I am not able to work, and yet have been unable to qualify for any sort of pension, and disability plan. I live in constant pain. I hurt all over some days and can't hardly move. My legs are painful most of the time, and the worst is in my knees with bone rubbing against bone because the cartiledge is all worn away. I'm not really sure where it goes to but apparently it's all gone. My energy levels are minimal at the best of times, and I am finding my life pretty stressful at the moment. There are a lot of things I just cannot talk about or share on here because it's not the thing to do.

I've also been spending time on a site called "Gather". I go to gather to write stories, poems, interesting things about me, and I'm able to read what others have written about themself, or the various stories that they have written. It seems to be a rather friendly group of people who share some common ground in the interest of reading and writing. I think it's a great site, and I just wish I had more stamina and ability for writing and for doing the work that is needed to become a writer. It is something I do enjoy doing. Better yet, it would also be a perfect answer to my prayers, as it is something I would actually be able to do here at home, without worrying if I'm able to get out and work at a regular job.


If anyone enjoys writing, be it short stories, poetry, real life stories. etc. then Gather is an interesting place to be. I know I enjoy it. As for blogging here, I do the best I am able to, which lately hasn't been much writing on here.

Perhaps another day ....


mo said...

My prayers are with you. For everything you've shared and your private pain as well. You are a dear and special person. I pray for you every day. I hope that you can enjoy Mother's Day and enjoy the love of your children for you.

dawn2454 said...

Thanks Mo. Prayers would certainly be appreciated.